WARNING: Frightening little self therapy session in process. Read at your own risk.
I'm 29 and I don't know what I want to do with my life. Does that frighten anyone else; because it certainly frightens me? I don't really have a passion in life. Oh I'm passionate about lots of things but nothing that I would call my passion, no mission. At this point I'm just not real sure what to do about this. I think I have a unique voice, an interesting perspective. I've always thought of the way I see the world as a gift. Surely I have other unique talents, I don't know what they are off hand, but I'm sure I have them. What is the best way to use them, share them?
I ask God to guide me everyday and for the most part I feel he has. He fated my best friend by giving us both big voices and a desire to throw other people in the air. Led me to him through her. Gave me a last minute change of heart that brought me to my husband. Convinced me to wait to have kids, which brought me the perfect child for me. I see God in these moments. These, far to perfect to be coincidence, moments. But now I have to ask. Is this where I'm suppose to be? Maybe it is; I'm just not so sure. Not to the right a few feet or maybe way over there? Which brings me to... Is God not speaking or am I not listening?
Thanks for reading.
"And I am flawed
but I am cleaning up so well
I'm seeing in me now the things you swore you saw yourself."
Dashboard Confessional
3 comments:
God's "quiet times" are the hardest for me. I'm convinced that he's never ignoring us but that sometimes the quiet is what he wants us to hear. The stillness, the knowing that he's still in control no matter what. Perhaps His silence means "hang tight, daughter. you're best is yet to come." Just remember that even though you don't hear Him right now doesn't mean you shouldn't keep talking & keep listening!
Love you!
i am hearin' ya. somedays i often wonder if what i am doing is what i want to do for the rest of my life. i want to go to school and do something, but i am not sure what i want to do. i hate it!!!
Whew...deep! I know what you mean though. I feel very blessed to know what my calling is for my profession, but what about the big picture? Will people remember me? I love that we have big voices:)! Love you...
Post a Comment